Would you describe yourself as a confident person? When you look In the mirror, what do you think when you see yourself? How is your self-talk? Is it positive or is it negative?

We hear the word confidence thrown around often in our society but what does it mean? According to the inner web, confidence means a feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities.

Most likely there are women and men in your life who you can identify, pretty much right away, as confident people. I am not referring to the negative connotation of the word confidence. I am referring to when someone carries themself well and feels good about where they are headed. There is something different about these people. They are confident in who they are.

I want to be like this. I want to be a confident person.

In 2020, in the thick of remote learning, my middle child was struggling with school. We knew he struggled to pay attention on a regular basis but we started to see the depth of his struggle as he was learning virtually from home. He became overwhelmed, insecure, and unhappy very quickly. We decided to get him tested and learned he had ADHD. After gathering more information and feeling good about our new found knowledge, we decided to tell our son his diagnosis and our plans to better help him at home and in school. When we explained to him about having ADHD, it’s like a lightbulb went off. He suddenly wanted to know everything there is to know about having ADHD. His aunt even bought him a book called, Journal of an ADHD Kid. He started to develop an inner confidence about what he learned about himself and how his brain worked. I love this new confidence our son developed. He has since then taken ownership about his “differences” and he is seeing himself in more of a positive light. 

During that time, Makai reminded me of how important it is to view one’s self. Confidence starts on the inside. It’s not dependent on our circumstances or the changes we face. As I was writing this post and asking my son permission to share about his ADHD journey, he shared with me something profound, “Confidence starts when you decide how you view yourself.” He’s such an “old soul”! This kid pushes me to be better. Nothing warms your heart more than watching your child be confident in who they are.  

My husband said the other day at church, “The position of our heart should always start from a place of fulfillment.” God designed us to be fulfilled completely by Him. As His children, He calls us whole, loved, chosen, and beloved. Why is it that we don’t alway view ourselves the way God views us? Simple. We live in a world that tells us our value, in other words, our confidence is wrapped in what we do and what we have.

I don’t want to get caught up in the world’s view of confidence or the world’s daunty expectations of success. I have a feeling you probably don’t want to either. I don’t want to find fulfillment in the wrong places. I did that for many years and it only left me with regrets and pain.

In order to practice and understand confidence, we must look at the position of our heart. What are we telling ourselves every day? What kind of self talk are we speaking over lives and our relationships? Are we believing what God’s word says about us?

My son was right, “Confidence starts when you decide how you view yourself. I would like to add that it also starts when we understand how God feels about us.

Remind yourself today who you are! You are God’s daughter. You are God’s son. You have purpose. You have everlasting fulfillment in Christ. Read scripture and allow it stick. Meditate on it.

Tell yourself the TRUTH every day.

Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.

Be confident in who God says you are because the way you view yourself changes everything.

1 Samuel 16:7, “But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”